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How getting turned down fired me up

6/15/2015

5 Comments

 
My own "breaking in" story is one I don't share very often. Or at least I don't share the full story. I routinely chart my career trajectory, but I tend to edit out the disappointing parts.  I guess that is natural.  But the more involved I get with Study Abroad Careers, the more I realize failure is an important part of my personal narrative. Without frustration I might not have uncovered my passion. And for this reason I have decided to share that story in today's post. 

a bad case of reverse shock

It was April 2001. I returned from my semester abroad, completely down in the dumps. I spent an hour alone at the Indianapolis airport, sitting on the curb by the taxis, reading Bridget Jones’ Diary. I was in no rush to return home. I wanted to remain anonymous, to get right back on that airplane and return to life in London. 

As the days passed, I found myself feeling uncomfortable with my own culture in new and curious ways. My inner dialogue was increasingly judgmental:

  • At Cracker Barrel: “Look at the size of that Coke. And those onion rings....They’re huge!” 
  • At Walmart: “I can’t believe she is going to the store in torn up jean shorts. Isn’t she embarrassed to be in public like that?” 
  • Around the house: “Americans don’t read enough. In London everyone reads during their commute.”
College graduation was just a few weeks later. I should have been elated. I had a job offer in my hometown that came with a decent salary in my field of study. A week after accepting, I called to tell them I could no longer accept the position. I can still hear my 22 year old voice speaking to the Director of City Planning, “I just feel that I’d be giving up on some of my dreams if I stayed here.” What in the heck was I thinking? I am sure he appreciated my “life discovery”. Gone was the job and the good reference I’d earned during my internship. To this day it is painful to remember the way I let that transpire.

By the end of the summer I was still jobless and still holding out hope for something international. My parents politely told me I needed to find something fast or leave. I responded by holing up in my room and reading the newly released book, Quarterlife Crisis: The Unique Challenges of Life in your Twenties. I thought I was was experiencing depression or some kind of existential crisis. I now realize it was just a bad case of reverse culture shock with inopportune timing.

I eventually got a paying job in retail and came out of my bedroom. Yet I still had this feeling that I needed to do something more meaningful. I asked myself the question you are supposed to in times of professional uncertainty,

Picture
The answer was clear and instant. I would go back to working my student receptionist job in international programs. I wanted to “rid the world of the ugly American” (ha!). And I thought orientation could, and should, be so much more. 

As luck would have it, a university in my hometown was hiring a secretary for their London program. It seemed perfect. During the academic year I’d live in town and summers would be spent abroad, on-site with students. This was a dream job.  I applied, and to my surprise, I landed an on-campus interview right away. They were concerned about my age and how I might be perceived by students, faculty, and parents. I left the interview hopeful. 

a different perspective

A few weeks later, on September 11, 2001, I returned home from work early for reasons that are now historical.  At a time when seemingly everyone in my country was in shock, asking “How could this happen to us?” I remained detached. I had no disillusionment about the way our country was viewed in the world. I had been out there and saw things through the lens of “other”. But I couldn’t express any of it. I felt like a traitor to think in this way. I still do.  

I found the commercialism of the time disgusting. Superstores all moved everything red, white, and blue to the end-caps because they were selling fast. Flip flops, ribbons, flags, paper plates. It was surreal. Amidst the confusion and endless TV reports, the uncertainty and numb feeling, I had an answering machine message blinking back at me. (Yes, we used those back then.) I didn’t get the job. 

Something happened in that instant and it flipped a kind of switch. When I listened to the message I just knew this is what I was called to do. I didn’t even feel disappointment just I vowed to try harder next time, to figure out what it was that was missing, and find a way to gain those skills and experiences. I took the timing as some strange cruel signal. 

Moving on

I don’t even remember when, but sometime that autumn I returned to my university and set up an appointment with the study abroad coordinator. I told her I wanted to get a job like hers and asked what I could do to work toward that goal. She explained I needed to keep studying Spanish, to get a master’s degree, and most importantly, to gain experience. She offered me the chance to be her graduate assistant the following two years if I was really serious about my desire to learn.

I also found a way to get back to London in the spring and arranged an informational interview with someone working on-site as a resident director for a US university. I asked her some of the same questions as the study abroad coordinator, 

  • How did you get your job?
  • What graduate degree do you have?
  • How did you get a work visa?
  • What do you like most about your job?
In August 2002 I returned to my Alma Mater, to begin the Student Affairs Administration graduate program and a 20 hour/week position as a graduate assistant for study abroad. I worked close to double the contracted hours. I loved my job. As a kind gesture the office paid for me to attend our regional NAFSA conference. This confirmed I was in the right place. 

The big break

A year into my assistantship I got a phone call from my supervisor late at night. She was burned out and had just given two-weeks notice to the university. No one knew but me. She suggested I get my resume together just in case, knowing how badly I wanted to work in the field. I was excited but completely overwhelmed. I wasn’t finished with my master's degree and I only had one year of experience. But I knew it was the opportunity of a lifetime and school would still be there. I applied and got the job. I was in the right time, at the right place, with the right experience. Suddenly I wasn’t just working in a job like hers. I was in her job. 

paying it forward

So many people I meet have similar stories regarding how they broke in to the field of international education. It can feel frustrating for it to all seem so serendipitous.  I suppose that is one of the reasons I founded Study Abroad Careers -- to provide support and resources to individuals as they question whether this is their path. There is no formula or secret to getting a job in study abroad. But there are themes -- networking, apprenticeship, and open-mindedness to name a few.  Hopefully that shines through in the stories you find here.
5 Comments
Brad Gottschlich link
6/15/2015 07:58:12 pm

Thanks for your comment, Kelly. I can relate to a lot of your post college hurdles being 26 myself.

Since your help at Ball State with my first study abroad, I've gone back to Germany 4 times and am currently in Germany on a Master's study abroad - good timing!

Say Hi to Peter for me.

Reply
Kelly K
6/17/2015 01:55:51 am

Hi Brad, Glad you found this piece something you could relate to. So happy to hear you found a way to continue living a global life. That is fantastic. Keep me posted!

Reply
Fargo
6/16/2015 12:38:58 am

Great article! Very eye opening and inspiring!

Reply
Elizabeth link
4/27/2016 11:34:31 am

I really enjoyed reading this! I've experienced a lot of up and down and A LOT of "disappointment" (I put it in quotes, because at the time it feels like disappointment, but after the fact I realize that it's all just leading me right to where I need to be), but I know I'm on the right track. I can't wait for my big break!

Reply
Kelly K. link
4/29/2016 10:00:00 am

Glad this personal piece resonated with you. I feel it is important for current professionals to share their setbacks and not just their success stories for the sake of those breaking in or moving up. Stay the course :-)

Reply



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